Rethinking Autonomy KARPMAN'S DRAMA TRIANGLE Confrontation with Results How to Confront with Results (Part 1) How to Confront with Results (Part 2) Questions On Confrontation More Thoughts on Confrontation (Part 1) Even More Thoughts on Confrontation (Part 2) Resilient Relationships GOALS & GRATS Calmmunication Calmmunication - Two Frequencies Calmmunication - Three Words That Create Barricades Calmmuncation - Four Approaches Calmmunication - Five Questions To Answer Calmmunication - Six Types of Listening Think Again (Collective Thinking) Think Again (Interpersonal Rethinking) Think Again (Individual Thinking) Otherish Giver Give & Take Formatting Forgiveness Part 1 Formatting Forgiveness Part 2 Feelings & Fences 8 Foundations Flooding Lake Present Invitation to Source Course 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Give It A Rest Rhythms of Rest Rest & Laziness Redefining Success A Boat Load of Success Success In Circles 1-3 Success In Circles 4-7 Awkward (Part 1) Awkward (Part 2) Love It or List It Time Budget 3 Words of Transformation (Should) 3 Words of Transformation (Good) 3 Words of Transformation (Could) Getting Even Estimating Value 7 P's OF PURPOSE 7 P's OF PURPOSE (PAST) 7 P's OF PURPOSE (PRESENT) 7 P's OF PURPOSE (PASSION) 7 P's OF PURPOSE (PEOPLE) 7 P's OF PURPOSE (PROFIT) 7 P's OF PURPOSE (PROGENY) 7 P's OF PURPOSE (PROFICIENCY) 7 P's of Purpose (Recap & Reflection) 3 P's OF INTEGRITY ONE PURPOSE OF EMOTIONS - CONNECTION TWO BASIC EMOTIONS THREE APPROACHES TO EMOTIONS FOUR RESPONSES TO EMOTIONS THE FIVE INDIGENOUS EMOTIONS THE SIX UNIVERSAL EMOTIONS POTENTIAL CONNECTIONS OF EMOTIONS A NUMBER OF THINGS ABOUT EMOTIONS ERROR & ERA FRIENDS PART 1 ERROR & ERA FRIENDS PART 2 ERROR & ERA FRIENDS PART 3 EXPECTATIONS FOR VACATIONS PART 1 EXPECTATIONS FOR VACATIONS PART 2 ARE THE GRATEFUL DEAD PART 1 ARE THE GRATEFUL DEAD PART 2 HOLIDAYS WITH THE IN-LAWS AND OUT-LAWS TRAIL THROUGH TRIALS OCCUPY DAYS FLY DAYS WHY DAYS QUESTIONS FOR TRANSITIONS THE HEALTHY RELATIONAL WINDOW DEPLETION OR COMPLETION PASSION THROUGH PLANNED NEGLIGENCE HIDE & SEEK COMMUNICATION PART 1 HIDE & SEEK COMMUNICATION PART 2 BOUNDARIES & WALLS ETR ENERGY TIME RESOURCES REST QUEST FORM & SPIRIT PART 1 FORM & SPIRIT PAR 2 FORM & SPIRIT PART 3 JOURNALING ON PURPOSE CHANGE IS A CONSTANT

STEP 1: LISTEN TO THE PODCAST


Think Again (Interpersonal Rethinking)

In this resource we discuss Adam Grant’s book Think Again where we explore the power of knowing what we don’t know and how we can apply this to our lives. This is the second resource in the series.

 
 
red to white small.jpg

STEP 2: TAKE THE ASSESSMENT


 
 

STEP 3: RE(SOURCE) YOUR HEALTH


Notes

II. Interpersonal Rethinking

A. Ask Better Questions

10.   Practice the art of persuasive listening. Seek to understand before being understood. Increase the question-to-statement ratio. 253 One tongue two ears

11.  Question should start with how rather than why. When people describe why they hold extreme views they often intensify their commitment and double down.  When they explain how they realize the limits of their understanding and start to temper their opinions. Why pulls us into judgment and proving. Think about the last time someone asked you “why did you do that?”

12.  Ask “What evidence would change our mind?” we can’t bully someone into agreeing with us. We are culture that is dealing with bullying of kids. Do you ever wonder where that comes from. Could it be adults pushing our own way and being overbearing and even forceful in our approach could be contributing to this? 

13.  Ask how people originally formed an opinion. Many of our opinions, like our stereotypes, are arbitrary; we’ve developed them without rigorous data or deep reflection. Opinions are like noses and just because some are more prominent doesn’t mean they smell better. 

This is so common in our culture today because we have so much exposure to information. It is key to do some digging of how people formed this information to begin with. 

B. Approach Disagreements as Dances, Not Battles

14.  Acknowledge common ground. A debate is like a dance, not a war. (If both parties are accepted and good exactly where they are then we can enjoy the dance and the missteps that will happen rather than trying to win. A good dance partner brings their own flavor to the dance. 

15.  Remember that less is often more. If we pile on too many different reasons to support our case, it can make our audiences defensive. Instead of diluting our argument, lead with a few of our strongest points. Keep it simple. 

16. Reinforce freedom of choice. People often reject the feeling of being controlled. Autonomy is to be respected. 

17.  Have a conversation about the conversation. If emotions are running hot, try to redirect the process. Sometimes by expressing our disappointment and frustration and asking people if they share it can de escalate

middle-white-to-black-gradient.png